You Know You Have a Problem When...

You open up your closet to choose a pair of pants and you find the exact same pair of pants TWICE! That's right, I have two pairs of the exact same pair of slacks from Gap (same size, color, length). I don't even remember buying one of them. I DO remember buying the other pair, but that second pair is still a mystery to me. I obviously liked them so much I had to buy TWO!

But I must defend myself a tad here. While I do have the same pair of pants twice, I haven't really done any shopping since the end of February. Do you remember how I gave up shopping for Lent? Well, I went the entire 40 days without buying anything (other than groceries), but then I continued to not buy anything long after Lent was over. A few weeks ago I bought a pair of biker shorts (I don't count that as shopping since it's for the MS 150 and highly needed), and I bought two tank tops the other day (they were on sale and I needed them-my old white tank tops were no longer white but rather a dingy grayish color). Before those two shopping trips, however, I went close to 75 days without shopping. I'm so proud of myself.

I'm turning over a new leaf. I really am, and I'm taking this moment to brag about myself a bit. I have gone to the mall a few times in the last 75 days. I have tried on clothes in the past 75 days. I have even walked up to the counter to purchase some clothes in the past 75 days. But then I had a moment of reflection.

"Shiloh, do you REALLY need this shirt?"
"No," I said to myself. "I don't need this shirt." And I put it back on the shelf and walked out of the store. I've done that three times in the past 75 days, and I'm very proud of myself.

I also earned a high five from Jeff the other day. He was so proud of me. I have my 10 year class reunion in two weeks, so I made a hair appointment. I was going to get a nice cut and dye. Then I had another moment of reflection (I'm beginning to hate these moments of reflection because they make me do things I don't want to do).

"Shiloh, can you afford to spend over $100 on your hair when you haven't paid rent in two months? Remember that eviction notice Shan left on your door last week? Maybe the money would be wiser spent paying rent."
"Stupid rent," I said to myself. "I need a good hair color to impress my classmates."
"You also need a roof over your head."

So I just got a haircut and skipped the color. And paid a portion of my rent.

I'm all grown up.