The Shi-Loh Down Week 1

The Shi-Loh Down Welcome to the first edition of my new weekly column, The Shi-Loh Down. Thanks to Aunt Lisa for coming up with the title. My friend, Rob (different Rob than I'm going to talk about below), also came up with some very clever names (I would expect nothing less from him): "Man Hunt," "Boy Toys," "Four Chicks and 20 Guys," "Huntin' Honey," or "Kiss and Tell." I was torn between The Shi-Loh Down and Kiss and Tell, but I liked the play on words with my name (seeing as how I'm an English teacher, I like the pun).

I am happy to announce that this week will not disappoint. It is full of new acquaintances, lots of drama and a possible date in the near future.

Let me first begin with my new "friends."

Dennis: I met Dennis at Induction, which is something all first year teachers have to go through to get a permanent license. Dennis is a brand new teacher to Chatfield (Social Studies), so I'll see him often. He's a very good looking Italian guy: olive colored skin, dark hair, dark eyes, a soft wave to his hair. He has an accent from Boston even though he's a CO native, and he is one of the most personable guys I've ever met. He's easy to talk to, he laughs easily and he makes people feel at ease in his presence. The ladies at school are very excited to have this new "eye candy" at school. I adore Dennis, but he's not someone I'll be dating. I'm not attracted to him that way, but I am confident we are going to be good friends.

Eric: I also met Eric this week at Chatfield. He's a new teacher (math), and I was immediately drawn to Eric from the get-go. He's a good looking guy, and his quiet demeanour had me intrigued. He didn't say much during our meetings, so as we filed out for lunch, I invited Dennis and Eric to ride with me to the restaurant since I know the area. At lunch, Eric started to open up a bit, and I discovered he taught at Golden High School for two years, and they had to cut his position this year, hence him coming to Chatfield. After lunch, Eric and I discovered our classrooms were side by side. This excited me even more, as I knew I'd be able to see him often. We sat by each other on our second day of training, and I realized he was very charming and funny. I was liking him more and more, and I was thinking he was on my list of guys to get to know. Friday afternoon, I stopped in his classroom to say hi. He was on the phone as I walked in and he was ending his conversation with, "I love you." As he hung up, he told me his wife was on her way to come visit his classroom. Married men should be required to wear a ring.
Friends it is!

Matt: This gentleman, while very good looking, gets the award for least amount of personality in the world. He's also a new teacher at Chatfield, so as I walked into our first meeting Tuesday, I was excited to see Dennis, Eric and Matt, all sitting side by side. Three very good looking men right in a row! I quickly discovered Matt has no personality whatsoever. He hasn't spoken to anyone, he sits with him arms crossed, and he has a nasty scowl on his face at all times. I'm not even sure if Matt will make it into the friends pile.

Mike, Trent, and Jerome: I really know nothing about these guys other than I made friends with them Saturday night. I was dancing it up at the Grizzly Rose, and these three men entered into my life for a brief moment. I don't know where they work, what they do or who they are, so I'm not sure if they qualify for my experiment as my rules state, but nonetheless, I introduced myself and chatted it up a bit.

Beau: Now this is an interesting story. Beau works for Enterprise Rent A Car, so I've actually talked to him several times throughout this summer, but we've never met face to face. I've heard people talk about Beau. They said he's very energetic, outgoing, personable and fun, and I could tell he was all those things just through talking to him on the phone. He worked at a branch down the road, so he was often calling to trade cars, etc. I remember the first time I talked to Beau. He was trying to call a certain branch, but when that branch doesn't answer within five rings, it flips to ringing at another office. I happened to be at the second office, and Beau was trying to reach the first office. I answered, and Beau asked for Kole. I told him Kole was working at the other office and that the phones must have flipped. He said he would try again. Once again, the phones flipped to me, so I answered again. He goes, "Now Shiloh, I don't believe in signs, but fate must be trying to tell us that we should talk. I'm going to call again and try to get Kole, but if you answer a third time, I'm going to have to ask you out on a date." I laughed and told him it was a deal. Kole must have answered the third time around because I didn't hear from Beau again that day. On another particular day, Beau called asking if he could have our SUV. I put Beau on hold to ask the manager, and she told me to tell Beau we had a customer coming in for the SUV (even though we didn't). I told Beau this lie, and he called me out on it. He said, "Shiloh , I know you're lying to me. I'm going to forgive you this time, but I expect it never to happen again."

So last night, I was meeting my friend Brandi at a restaurant. Brandi and I were going to go the Grizzly Rose. She asked if she could invite some friends, and I told her I would pick them all up at 8pm. I entered the restaurant, and I saw Brandi sitting with a cute guy. I approached and introduced myself. The guy looked at me and said, "You're Shiloh? Shiloh from Enterprise? The infamous Shiloh?" I had no idea who this guy was, and I was a little thrown off that he knew me. Come to find out, this was Beau. We finally met face to face. He told me he actually thought I was Asian based off my name, and he had me pictured as a short, little Asian girl with brown hair and brown eyes. He said, "I have to admit, I'm a little thrown off. I wasn't expecting a blond hair, blue eyed, beautiful lady." He's quite the charmer, isn't he? We clicked right away. He IS very charming, very personable, very fun, just like everyone said. We had a very enjoyable night together, and he kept saying he wanted to take me on a date so he could get to know me. I drove him and Brandi home after we were done dancing, and as I dropped him off at his door, he wanted to give me his number. I didn't want to be the one who had to call him, so I told him he could get my number from Brandi if he really wanted to take me on a date. I'll let you know if he follows through.
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When I was thinking about doing this social experiment, I figured I'd meet a few guys, have a little fun and that would be it. Possibly I'd find a great guy, which would be amazing, but at the very least, I would have some new friends. What I didn't realize is that I'd learn a little bit about myself along the way. Perhaps that seems obvious to some of you, but after a little bit of drama last night, which I'll share in a moment, I realized some things about who I am and what I want.

I understand that this is only week one of my game and that I have a lot to learn over the upcoming weeks. I promise to you and to myself that I am going to be completely honest with my thoughts, emotions, and questions through this process. Perhaps some of you will think I'm being too transparent and that my blog isn't the place to share some of my thoughts, but in order to be fair to myself and this process, I feel that I need to be open.

Here's the drama that I promised I'd write about: To make a really long story short, I have been dating/hanging out with a guy since January. We've had a bumpy road at times, but we've also had a lot of fun moments, too. What's been interesting, and what I saw last night, is that I was going against all the advice I've ever given to other girlfriends while with Rob. There's an old addage that states that if a guy wants to be with a girl, he will do everything in his power to make it work. Well, Rob wasn't doing that with me. He was making excuses as to why we couldn't be together, why we couldn't date, why we should only be friends, etc. I allowed him to walk all over me, and sadly enough, he always made me look like the drama filled girl and the one always in the wrong. I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but I think I'm a pretty fabulous catch. I have a lot to offer, but Rob just wasn't seeing that. He was only seeing what he wanted to see.

Last night at the Grizzly Rose, Rob was there, too. I most certainly didn't expect to hit it off with Beau in the way that we did, and I'm not the type of girl who would try to make Rob jealous by hanging out with Beau instead. But Rob made the mistake of telling me he's been hanging out with another girl. He proceeded to tell me her name, her occupation, where they met, etc. This pushed me over the edge with him. I had finally had enough. I was through with him taking advantage of me, using me and then not caring how I felt. I walked away from him last night vowing to never talk to him again. I tried to erase him from my mind and enjoy myself, so I spent the rest of the evening with Kari, Brandi, and Beau. I left without saying goodbye to Rob, and when he tried calling me a little later on, I didn't aswer the call. Then Rob texted and said, "Thanks for ignoring me. I will never understand you." When I didn't reply to that, he wrote, "The reason I don't date you is because of how you acted tonight. Goodbye Shiloh."

And there is the real Rob. The Rob who thinks it's ok to tell me about his other girlfriend and expect me to be ok with it. The Rob who thinks he can ignore me all night and it's ok, but when I ignore him, he throws a fit. The Rob who thinks he can walk all over me and I won't stick up for myself. Walking away last night was really tough, I'm not going to lie. I know it will get easier with time, and meeting all these new guys is going to help, too. But it's still hard to say goodbye to someone you care about.

So the lessons learned from week one are:

There are a tone of fabulous men out in this world, and when you catch the attention of one, he'll let you know he's interested.

Never settle for someone. Be with a guy who wants to be with you.

Walking away is really hard but it will only allow me to become a stronger person and make room for someone who actually wants to be a part of my life without all the excuses.

Not all married men wear rings.